My Battle with Viking's Majestic Hoop...

I swear to god....the people at Viking (who made my Diamond) and Dell-with-the-stupid-E must be one and the same people....and the only good thing about them is....I do believe they make me have occasional flashes of genius....to wit: I spent the entire day yesterday fighting with both of them. You know the story of the computer--wouldn't boot up...hell, I couldn't get it to wear sneakers, let alone boots. Finally the damned thing comes "up," from wherever it's been (like it's been on vacation or something? why do we always say, "it's up?")

 

Anyway, I wanted to do a design on my "Majestic" hoop. Now, this is the largest hoop Viking makes--it's so damned big it fills up a room. It's 350x360 in millimeters--whatever that means in inches, but trust me--that's f'ing huge. So, I wanted to do a design--and it's ONE OF VIKING'S  OWN DESIGNS, EVEN--not one I made up, for god's sake....it's one they TELL YOU TO USE THEIR MAJESTIC HOOP FOR!!! Goodie, I think--now I can finally use this thing. But nooooooooo....I keep getting error messages. I read their stinking manual--manual? It's a page & a half of pictures, and they even tell you about that error message, and THEY say, "just move the design when you get that message." MOVE IT? Move it where? It fills up the WHOLE STINKING HOOP, you idiots. There IS no place to move it. So, I figure there must be a "setting" or something I need to change--and of course, there is. Which I do--on my computer, now that "it's up" from it's vacation.

 

STILL NO GOOD. I give up, call Demaris, tell her I need alcohol, let's go out for dinner. I've spent the whole day trying to outsmart Viking and Dell and I'm IN NEED of a fix--badly. David even called and I must have sounded so beat/whipped when I answered and just said hello, he burst out laughing and the way I answered the phone (sob), and then said, "sorry about that--can I help?" Not unless you can magically make Majestic do her thing, I'm thinking...or make Dell stay "up" where's it's supposed to....for freakin' ever.

 

As usual, he's no help (they never are)....

 

This morning, however, I have my "flash of genius" when I think to myself-----maybe I need to directly connect my USB cable from the computer to the sewing machine, and the settings preferences I selected will magically transmit themselves over to the machine via the airwaves (or some such cyberbullshit like that), and my problem will be resolved....so at the wee hours of the morning, before I've even FINISHED my coffee, I run downstairs, practically naked (but not really), and start connecting any wires I can find....of course, good old Dell has decided to go on a f'ing vacation again....sh**T and damnation, that thing goes on more f'ing vacations than I ever EVER took in my 30 year career....so I have to go find it, drag it back "UP" from wherever it's BEEN, re-BOOT the f'er, and wait for IT to come back (where does it go? and why do we say THAT?...wait for it to come "back"?) But, finally, it does, lines are connected, I feel like a mad scientist about to blow up the downstairs, waiting for a transmittal to occur........................and--

 

POOF, like magic, the design pops up on the machine and now it says, "Do you want us to embroider all on one side before we stop and do the other side, please master of our universe, or would you like us to just do the entire side and then stop so you can admire what we've done and then you can turn it over and we'll do the other side?" (Actually, it just says, "Check box: one side or both sides embroidered first?" Or some abbreviated bull like that....you can check EITHER box, too--instructions say it doesn't matter. Really? Then why did you put it in there, you idiots?) And, away we go.....

 

Is it worth it? I'll let you know. I wanted to do this huge design to make a bag on faux leather. I'm so exhausted just getting it on there, I nearly forgot why I was doing it. But, now I know how. As I said at the beginning, I'll never get Alzheimer's if this keeps up....my brain might be the one organ someone could donate to science when I die. For sure my liver will be shot, according to CVS and the doctor....but my brain? Sharp as a tack, thanks to Viking & Dell.